Is it just me?

Lately, I'm quite a bad company, I would say. My temper isn't exactly summer breeze, more like volcanic, I'll admit. Somehow, a small little things pisses me off. Everything is just not right.

Is it me? Is it just my problem?


Seriously, at this moment, I really don't know.

I don't want to be in bad mood too, but the slightest things seems to ignite my fire within. There's more than one scenario when I wished to chopped that person's head off. Damn that would be so satisfying! The thought, I mean.

Tell me how would you feel? if you were me...

Recently, I have dumped nearly a month of my salary into buying something beneficial which will secure my life better (or so they claimed) i was practically forced into it anyway but that's beside the point. The point is, I have told somebody about it exactly a month earlier.

In fact I have send a copy of my policy to the person in hope he will help me go through it as well. But that person probably didn't get it or something. Nevermind. But what pisses me off is, after I have signed my policy, after I have paid for my premium, this person come up and say, "hey, I think your policy no good la, cheat your money only." Not exactly in those words, but I figure the meaning is close.

This person proceed by telling me how this person has shown my policy to another agent and how that agent find so many loopholes and problems etc etc etc. Thing is, first don't you think this person should have done it earlier and tell me all this BEFORE i confirmed the policy by signing it?

Hello? Is there any use by telling me now? I have already paid the money and there's no turning back. Then what's the point of telling me how that person's policy would be better bla bla bla?

"Oh, I just concerned bout you"

Don't you think this "concern" came too late? Do you think I want it now? A concern came too late was never needed in the first place. Because I feel that you are such a hypocrite. And I detest hypocrites!


Ohhhh I'm damn pissed off!


Is it just me? If you were me, how would you feel?


Perhaps I'm bitter, I don't know.


But is it that hard to be sensitive to other people's feeling?


There's more scenario that pisses me off lately as well, but I just don't have the mood to blog it out. I'm not sure by blogging this out, am I doing the correct thing? But I really need a space to vent my anger and since this is my blog, I can technically write anything I want right?


p/s: not meant to offend/insult anyone but this is just two penny of my thought. No pun intended.

Broke and sick

Yours truly is now broke + sick. I wonder which is worse, broke or sick?

This month alone, or more accurately the first week of April, yours truly had managed to spent ALL of her salary already. And she still have bout 20 days more to go before her next pay check due. Sobs.....how am I gonna make ends meet this time????

Before you start to reprimand me for my spending habit, please note that all the money spent was well worth, despite being a little steep, that's it. And everything just have to pile up at one go, so convenient -.-"

First of all, yours truly had bought an insurance coverage finally. Along with medical card, this insurance scheme has taken two third of my meager salary away. The last portion of my salary goes to my baby car.

So happened that my car service is due this month so after the regular check ups, it is found that there is some "problems" with my car's front absorbers (actually it's known already that something is wrong, but it's just yet to be determined). Needless to say, it's time for a new pair of absorber to join my baby. Ka-ching!

As if that is not bad enough, my car front tyres has reach its limit, and time to go as well. Ka-ching! New tyres means money spent. Oh yeah, by this time, my wallet is definitely bleeding not to mentioned my heart is also bleeding love.

So, in short, all my salary is gone already. God knows the remaining balance of the month yours truly is only to survive on bread and plain water alone.

Oh! and did I mentioned that that's not the end of my car problem? Apparently I still need to change something more then only my baby is consider in tip top condition? That will cost me another 300 bucks and that will just have to wait until next month. Because no matter how, I will not be able to vomit 300 bucks right now.

I am now still trying to figure out how to pump petrol when my money runs low????


No wonder I fall sick....

My journey thus far...

I know I have been abandoning my blog for like centuries, my bad, but i just do not have anything interesting to blog about. Even if I do, I do not have the time to do it anyway.

Last few weeks has been a crazy one for me. Workload is like neverending despite me putting on extra work hours everynight, sometimes including Saturdays too, which by right is my holidays. Not to mentioned, those extra hours put in is like giving charity (cuz im not paid for it) Bummer!

I have always wanted to fulfil one my childhood dream (not gonna share with you which one yet) and this time I finally mutter my courage to go for it. I did my best research hoping I will succeed but alas, I did not made it.

Yeah, of course I was heartbroken and all, but there's nothing I can do about it. I tried to do a post mortem to find out why did I fail, and hopefully I'm heading to the right decision.

Right now I'm trying my best to minimize my chances of failure by doing everything I can to eliminate/reduce my weakness. Of course, I do not have any idea if I will succeed the next time.

Yet, suddenly I think I won't make it again (yeah I'm quite a demotivator as I keep thinking that I will fail ALL the time) can't help it, competition is stiff, man! And I DO have many many weaknesses afterall.

So right now I am wondering why is it that hard to fulfil my dream? Why is it this hard to reach for my star? Despite all that I've done, if in the end the result is still the same, is it worth all the trouble that I went through?

Almost thinking of quitting now, but then, I won't be able to live with myself if I do now. However, I do not know if I can take the blow if I fail again for the second time.

What should I do?